coincidences and God

Do you ever have those moments where you KNOW that they are completely and utterly moments where God is working? Where events seem to just work together so perfectly? Some people might call them coincidences, I  like to call them God-incidences.

I just had one of those.

I have gone through a semester of intense learning. I have grown leaps and bounds in my faith. I can't express how much of a change I see in myself and how I view events. I have gone from having absolutely no clue what I was going to be doing six months down the road to having a rough idea of what the next six months is going to hold. I've gone from being very unsure of what my passion was to being confident that I have discovered it. I know where my heart is, I have some idea of what purpose God has created me for.

At the beginning of the semester, it felt like I was in a holding pattern of sorts. I was waiting. At first, I struggled a lot with God telling me to be still and wait, to get to know Him, His character, and His plans. I didn't want to wait. I wanted to be doing something. I wanted to hurry up and get to the "good" stuff. Yet God knew that I wasn't ready for it. I needed the time of waiting to dig deep into what it meant to live for God, to get to know God on a even more personal level.

Now, about three months later, I am starting to see all the pieces come together. I may not be able to see the whole picture yet but I know that every single encounter that I have is important. Whether it be talking with a woman at Starbucks or trying out a new church or seeing a student counselor, they all have an eternal impact.

It makes  me a lot more conscious of how I interact with people. Because you never know when that person or that encounter could become a life-changing moment.

Abba, I thank you and praise you for the work that I see you doing in my life! Thank you for my times of waiting and preparation. Thank you for opening my eyes to the seemingly small moments. Help me to keep my eyes trained on you in this next period of my life. Thank you! Thank you Abba!

starbucks and amen

I love Starbucks. I love walking in the door and feeling like I've walked into one of my good friend's house. Maybe part of this feeling is that I go to Starbucks a lot. Its a place of differing things. It's a place where I am both productive and procrastinator; where I am introspective and outgoing; where I am, in the truest sense of the word, me.

A while ago, I decided that I didn't like always getting the same drink every single time I went to Starbucks. So I started asking for a surprise drink, or a barista's choice. It's like an adventure in a cup. A little surprise party to celebrate another day alive.

Today while at Starbucks, I was writing in my prayer journal, getting ready to end my journal entry. I suddenly remembered a conversation that I had in my Bible study group earlier this week. It was about the meaning of "Amen."

A good way I heard it explained is that Amen is basically what Mary said to the angel after he came and told her that she was going to have a baby.

And Mary said,  

   Yes, I see it all now:
   I'm the Lord's maid, ready to serve.
   Let it be with me
   just as you say. 

Then the angel left her. 

                                    ~  Luke 1:38 (The Message) (Emphasis added by blogger)

That is what Amen means. That means a whole lot more than just a single word to end a prayer or a word to show your agreement with what's being said. It's so much more of a commitment to say, "Let it be with me just as you say."

Abba, I pray that I would be like Mary. Let it be with me just as you say.

facebook and freedom

I was cleaning out my laptop hard drive and came across a Facebook conversation with one of my friends from last summer. The thing that struck me was how much I've changed. Since my illness, I've been stuck in fear. I started going to a counselor and I realized that I have a fear of failure. And yet, only 12 months ago, I had a completely different perspective.

Here's my part of the Facebook conversation:

"...failure has another definition: an act or instance of failing or proving unsuccessful; lack of success. that kind of failure, in my opinion, is a better kind of failure. because at least with that kind, you TRIED; you took a risk at something you enjoyed/were passionate about"

I want to be set free from this debilitating fear of failure and rejection. I want to believe that even if I fail, taking a risk is worth it. I want to have the courage to try, fail, and get up and try again.

So here's my declaration for everyone to hear (technically read).
I,  Katlin, am not going to be stuck in fear. Christ has already set me free, he set me free the minute I accepted him. I will NOT let this fear keep me from living of a life of freedom. I am choosing to take control of the freedom that God has given me and hold on to that. I am free!

"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." ~ Galatians 5:1